Being renewed in faith one tends to have a fiery outlook on most things.

Nothing seems colorful anymore. Our stance looks at life as either black or white. There’s no room to walk the fence line where all the colors may be. There’s no space to pick and chose the color you could filter your views through. Life is either for Christ, or it’s against. Riding the fence is no longer an option.

Being on fire for the Lord is the way brothers and sisters should be. Living as an example of Christian living in an often hostile world is a calling that we must endure.  However, striving for the fruits of the spirit in our walk will lead us to pause and think of what Jesus would do. When we interact with life around us, we must not only have that fire propelling us forward, we need to keep discernment on the forefront and wisdom will lead us to do the Lord’s will.

When I came out of a dark time of post partum depression, years of anxiety and sheer hopelessness, I gave all credit to the Lord. I wanted to tell everyone. My telling resulted in knee jerk defense and tearful arguments. I knew the truth, but I was so determined that everyone have an immediate turn to faith when I simply said that Jesus was the only way, tears would flow, blubbering occurred, and my reaction seemed foolish to the non-believer. I wanted Jesus to be an overnight sensation, but I felt like I dragged us down to has-beens in my lack of discerning wisdom.

James 1:19 ESV

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger

That was not me. I didn’t want to hear talk about ungodly things and I wanted to shout truth in my anger. How dare someone not believe in my Jesus. Don’t they know that they, too, will one day bow down to the one they don’t understand?

What I was lacking was grabbing on to the fruit. It was there, but I didn’t care. I wanted people saved right then, and I felt that my words should beat them into belief. I quickly understood that my approach was wrong and I needed the guidance that the Lord was trying to give me. I needed to embrace the fruit.

Galatians 5:22-23

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

I had love, but hatred of injustice against the Lord drove me away from peace, patience, kindness, gentleness and self-control. I had faith, but wasn’t relying on the faithfulness of the Lord. And my joy, that was only for me and I didn’t want to share it unless they followed me to the truth. It didn’t work the way I wanted it to. I had to have a good long pause and reset.

Now J have found meekness. I sometimes think I have gone extreme in the other direction. I am not assertive in my writing ministry or in speaking much. I quietly share and live as an example through service, discipleship in my home and studies with like-minded people. This is where my relationship with Jesus has grown and my walk as strengthened. No amount of anger or Bible beating has done as much as a gentle spirit.

I pray that gentleness can propel me to be a better witness, producing far more than ever.

Thank you for joining me on this 17th day of the 31 Days of Five Minute Writing Prompts. Today’s theme is: PAUSE. Please follow me and see what else I am writing at this link.